The Best Self-Care Strategies for Each Enneagram Type, Right Now

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Nevertheless it’s not a lot that I miss these precise actions as I’m pining for what they symbolize. I’m a Seven on the Enneagram, which suggests I extremely worth the power to be impulsive, to make choices that carry me pleasure, even when they appear petty or unwise, as a manner to deal with stress. (And boy, am I burdened.) 

So as an alternative of endlessly eager for what I can’t have, I’m discovering methods to recreate the identical emotions by shopping for myself treats on-line, ordering takeout a couple of occasions per week, and reaching out to long-distance associates for a much-needed FaceTime chat once I really feel low. 

Grievances and coping methods aren’t one measurement matches all. What we miss and the way we cope with it varies based mostly on our personalities. I surveyed 75 individuals to achieve some perception about what every Enneagram kind misses most and, extra importantly, how every quantity is coping. Right here’s what I discovered about how every kind offers with pandemic-level stress.

At their core, Ones are accountable and sensible with a robust ethical compass. They thrive after they can enhance issues, and that features bettering themselves. Ones are orderly and arranged, and at occasions, perfectionistic. They love routine as a result of it serves their want to be balanced and good.

I’m lacking management. My tried and true methods of retaining my family taken care of are not relevant. Even shopping for groceries has been a battle since we aren’t going to the shops and are relying on supply and don’t know which issues can be out of inventory. Now that we’re half-way by means of the Keep At House order I’m trying so as to add extra construction to my time, together with getting the behind the scenes work carried out for a enterprise to open when that is throughout. For the primary few weeks I’d vaguely construction my days and simply attempt to get one factor achieved within the afternoons whereas my husband works from dwelling. We’ve been additionally retaining common meal occasions and bedtime routines. I stroll my canine virtually day-after-day on the identical time.” -Katie, 35, Kansas Metropolis

“As a 1, I wish to repair every part in my life, and proper now my life is in my home. It’s so onerous for me to not see every part that may very well be higher in my little world since we’re right here ALL THE TIME.  I’ve truly been utilizing this ‘further time’ to follow being an anti-1, one thing my therapist has been encouraging me to do. I’ve been deliberately doing issues that really feel good or really feel connective as an alternative of duties. For instance, once I really feel sizzling and bothered in regards to the disorganization of my kitchen cupboards, I’ve been strolling away from it and happening an extended mid-day stroll. Or when the sticky spots on the ground begin to overwhelm me, I’ve been inviting the youngsters to hitch me in one other room and play Uno.” -Elizabeth, 37

“As a result of I don’t like feeling like I’m not giving 100% to something—my job, my children, my husband, my associates—I’m waking up early to get some alone time earlier than my household wakes up and the day begins.” -Jillian, 35

“It’s vital for me to separate the place I work and the place I relaxation, however out of the blue I do every part in a single place, which is making relaxation a bit more durable lately. I’m happening A LOT of walks and get outdoors as a lot as I can.” -Ashton, 25

Merely put I positively miss the management I as soon as had over my life. I miss having the ability to make plans, juggle a busy calendar, and join with family members. It’s troublesome for me to remain idle and understand myself as ‘unproductive’ and being pressured to do this has been difficult. I ordered some paint by numbers which have been an enormous stress reliever. I additionally attempt to follow a schedule—weekly digital sport nights or hangouts have been a life saver, in addition to Saturday residence clear sweeps.” -Marisa, 29

Twos like to really feel helpful as a result of they like to really feel wanted—in order that they spend their time and vitality on empathy and generosity towards others. Whereas Twos have a primary worry of being undesirable and unworthy, in addition they genuinely care about others’ well-being.

What they miss and the way they’re coping:

I miss feeling helpful, so I’m doing numerous random acts of kindness, like shopping for somebody flowers and leaving them on the porch, choosing up groceries for a pal or safely sharing baked items.” -Jess, 32

“The toughest half has been the strain I placed on myself to maintain everybody cared for who I’m in contact with and the shortcoming I really feel to assist others cuz I’m caught in my rattling home. I’m doing a little deep work on why I’ve these expectations for myself and studying that I’m cherished even once I can’t do as a lot. My worth doesn’t come from that. I’ve been in a position to give myself a lot journaling time and writing venture time. (Additionally it helps that I do know I’m truly HELPING by staying dwelling.)” -Sara, 27

“I’m feeling like I’m doing loads for everybody else, however am probably not realizing the way to talk what I really want on this season. Additionally, since I can’t essentially be aspect by aspect serving to others, I’ve needed to be artistic. I’ve been actually having fun with sending playing cards and notes of encouragement to others. It feels good to (hopefully) assist lighten their burdens with a shock within the mail. I even have just a little Etsy store and my postcards have been taking off. I’ve discovered numerous reduction and pleasure in packaging these up, realizing one thing I’ve created is actually serving to join individuals in these unusual occasions. On a sensible be aware, we’ve designated Friday night time as a date night time the place we get takeout and I don’t must prepare dinner. It’s one much less factor on my plate, which I sit up for each week.” -Jenna, 33

I miss having the ability to hug and see individuals! I’m ordering takeout and treats from my favourite small companies, and doing (contact-free!) drop offs for associates.” -Hanna, 28

Threes really feel most beneficial, and most themselves, when they’re conducting one thing. Extra image-conscious than different varieties, Achievers have a transparent imaginative and prescient of success, they usually’ll cease wanting nothing to realize it. At their core, they’re adaptive and efficient, they usually wish to be affirmed as a result of it makes them really feel worthwhile.

What they miss and the way they’re coping: 

The toughest half is having the ability to successfully get as many issues carried out. My whole workflow has been altered with distant work and having the youngsters round. It’s additionally been a problem not seeing associates as a lot and feeling the missed connections there. Additionally, feeling very cooped up in the home and antsy to get out and do one thing, however there’s nothing to do! 

“The three in me actually desires to perform one thing and really feel that reward of accomplishment, nevertheless it’s onerous on this season when there are much more obstacles to having the ability to achieve success within the office. To manage, I’m growing new techniques to assist me keep organized and environment friendly at work. Additionally, since I don’t have a commute, I’m making an attempt to get up earlier and spend my commute time doing yoga, studying and/or meditating, and doing issues that make me really feel productive.” -Kelsey, 32

My distinctive battle with being an achiever on this time is that I’ve an inflated sense that everybody else is killing it and I’m not, and everybody else has alternatives I’m not getting. That’s regular for me, nevertheless it’s amplified in the course of the pandemic. It’s onerous to steadiness the necessity to obtain with the information that this can be a bizarre time, and the targets I set earlier than is likely to be realized in another way on this new dynamic. It’s been useful to maintain up with routines I set earlier than the pandemic, which helps me really feel like I’m assembly targets. I’ve additionally elevated the extent of my exercises so there’s one thing to attain, and it’s additionally a bodily approach to work out the struggles I’m experiencing.” -Sarah, 41

Inventive and inventive, Individualists are the “poets” of the Enneagram. They aren’t afraid of their feelings, they usually crave time to deal with their emotional wants. Whereas Fours are like magnets to something stunning, in addition they tend to withdraw from different individuals.

What they miss and the way they’re coping: 

I miss having the ability to really feel individuals’s feelings in face-to-face interplay. I’m introverted and don’t *want* a ton of social interplay, however one thing I do love is studying or sensing individuals’s vitality and emotions in particular person so I can higher decide the way to be a useful & caring pal. I additionally, after all, miss having the ability to take my children locations to burn their vitality! I’ve gladly participated in much more telephone calls, FaceTime conversations, and Zoom convention calls with associates & household. I, like many in my era, sometimes keep away from these issues underneath most circumstances. However I now discover myself trying ahead to them (carefully, after all).” -Jess, 30

“I miss the liberty of going to the grocery retailer with out it being an enormous occasion; I miss consuming in my favourite eating places. I’m frightened in regards to the small enterprise house owners in my group and the financial system typically. BUT, I’m loving the comfy time at dwelling and lack of obligations. In some methods, THIS IS MY TIME. I’m dealing with plenty of wine and takeout and obsessively cleansing and organizing my home.” -Caroline, 36, Dallas

“It’s so onerous having my entire household dwelling on a regular basis. I’m by no means alone. It looks like I’m working out of air to breathe. I generally sit in my automobile within the driveway to work or learn alone. And it’s not an ideal repair, however my noise-cancelling headphones have positively seen much more motion recently!” -Ashley, 30, St. Paul, MN

I’m lacking the power to do work outdoors of my own residence and get inspiration from the world round me. I’m additionally having hassle retaining on my schedule although I write them out further completely as a result of I’m not motivated on this area. As somebody who likes alone time and artistic free area, I’m making an attempt to relish in that point as a lot as I can. I additionally am musically inclined and attempt to make the temper in my area shift by enjoying totally different new music so I can re-focus.” -Grace, 18, Chicago

I’m uninterested in being caught in the identical routine with no selection. I’m discovering myself planning for the long run and daydreaming. I’m shopping for costly art work to really feel pleasure and going for lots of walks and drives to vary up surroundings.” -Jess, 33, Minneapolis

I miss the liberty to come back and go as I please, so I’m taking lengthy walks, climbing, studying, listening to music, burning sage/incense/candles, diffusing oils, searching for magnificence and goodness. Additionally, I’m supporting small companies by purchasing on-line.” -Christy, 39

“In Spain we can’t go outdoors for walks or train, and we dwell in a small residence with no personal outside area. I’m beginning to really feel like I’m shedding vibrance and primary well being as a result of I can’t go outdoors, and this freaks me out. I additionally want time to myself that I don’t really feel like I’m getting. I take lengthy baths at bizarre occasions of day, learn loads, hearken to podcasts and spend extra time than regular in my bed room and hanging out the window. I’ve additionally been cooking good meals and making an attempt to make issues particular and memorable in a optimistic manner for my household.” -Rosalie, 35

Mind is a core worth for Fives, who like to be taught and drawback resolve. They are often remoted and withdrawn, however solely due to their tendency to get misplaced of their minds and determine life out. Their primary worry is to be ineffective, and their primary want is to be competent.

What they miss and the way they’re coping: 

I miss being alone. Being dwelling is okay, however everybody can be at all times dwelling with me. To manage, I take a shower on the finish of the day to calm down and be quiet, ship my children out to play, learn extra fiction, and have dance events within the kitchen when everybody’s had sufficient.” -April, 34, Houston

“The toughest factor has been our home having three children and three adults and never having the ability to escape one another. I want a break. I want I might go into the workplace and have somebody watch my children. Final Saturday, my husband watched the youngsters downstairs for 4 hours so I may very well be in my room and do no matter I wished to for that time frame.” -Becky, 29

“No babysitters means no break from children to go do issues with my partner or on my own (no alone time or uninterrupted time). We’re making an attempt date nights at dwelling submit bedtime. We additionally requested the neighbor lady if she is going to cling in our yard and simply monitor them whereas we take a stroll, or my partner stays dwelling whereas I get out.” -Lydia, 33

“As a 5, being trapped with different individuals is certainly a private hell, regardless of how a lot I really like my household. Not having the ability to get away is what I miss most. I’m realizing how badly I, as a mom of babies, relied on excursions for “me” time. Irritability and sibling rivalry are at all-time highs. I spend a lot of the day refereeing and a lot of the night time recovering, staying up extraordinarily late simply to be alone and never wanted. The entire household misses the routine and schedule. I’m sort of treating it as a highway journey or summer season trip. Extra indulgences like magazines and treats we don’t normally purchase. I lastly purchased Spotify Premium to hearken to music with out adverts. As a 5, I’m permitting a lot extra display time for my children to maintain them from squabbling and to present me a break so I can conceal in my room away from everybody. I purchased one more hen feeder and extra seed for birdwatching. We’re additionally digging into the artwork provides, video games, and books I’ve been amassing for years.” -Caitlin, 32

“It hasn’t impacted the smaller issues of my day—I’ve at all times been a stay-at-home sort of particular person and stored to myself; I’m a voracious reader and I really like books. However even for me it’s very isolating. I miss my household (my mother is excessive danger) and associates, going to museums and low retailers. I discover myself daydreaming and studying extra fantasy-genres that present a way of escape. I used to be already studying that style earlier than COVID, however the temptation to “keep” in these worlds, and in my very own thoughts, is stronger.” -Celinda, 30

Sixes may come off as anxious, however their orientation towards safety is a large asset—anybody with this character kind might be essentially the most loyal and accountable particular person you recognize. Motivated by the will to have their wants met, Sixes are at all times scheming methods to foretell and stop issues. 

What they miss and the way they’re coping: 

“One of many hardest elements for me will not be realizing what is predicted from me with work and retaining in contact with household and associates. I’m grateful to have the ability to earn a living from home throughout this time, however I’m continuously questioning if I’m doing sufficient or if I’m gonna be ‘caught’ for slacking off. I’ve been checking in with my supervisor and making an attempt to have grace for myself. I’m reminding myself that I’m a tough employee underneath regular circumstances and this isn’t a standard time.” -Rachel, 26

“I’m obsessive about having a plan and know what’s going to occur subsequent. So, I want all the knowledge. I’ve been checking the John Hopkins Coronavirus map on a regular basis, 3-5 occasions a day at the least. I’m additionally not watching what I eat as a lot as I usually would and figuring out far more. The extra I transfer my physique the much less nervousness I’ve. Walks and exercises have been my greatest coping mechanisms. Additionally, wine.” -Brittany, 30

I’m searching for solutions. On a regular basis. Anyplace. I watch CNN now, although I’ve by no means watched it earlier than. I really like The Cuomo brothers—and the medical doctors.” -Carol, 60

“I don’t know what info to belief. I do know some info is fake or distorted, and I’m feeling overwhelmed with how a lot individuals disagree and have such polar opinions. I’m feeling overly hooked up to my shut tribe. Probably not appearing out as co-dependent, however simply needing that ‘sense’ that I’ve a very shut, reliable group. Additionally, I’m studying loads. Books really feel secure.” -Chantel, 31

“As a 6, I’m pushed by the hustle and bustle of an workplace and in (small scale) disaster administration and I’ve felt a scarcity of motivation with fewer alternatives to troubleshoot final minute challenges. Provided that I thrive off of/am motivated by conditions that different would characterize as “anxious” I’ve began outlining my day by day duties—with cut-off dates—after which setting self timers. I’ve arrange a sport that offers me the increase I want to remain motivated.” -Whitney, 34

Sevens are known as the Fanatic for a motive: They’re motivated by freedom and spontaneity, usually as a approach to cowl up uncomfortable emotions. Excitable and vibrant, Sevens will do absolutely anything to really feel content material and glad.

What they miss and the way they’re coping:

The toughest factor for me has been lacking enjoyable for myself and my children. I’ve been beginning a ton of enjoyable tasks, like tie-dying garments and portray my home.” -Maria, 34, St. Paul, MN

I’m lacking bike rides to concert events and low retailers and the farmers market. I’m burning plenty of candles and incense, baking outdoors within the solar, crafting wonderful meals, and doing a great deal of studying and writing.” -Daje, 26, Knoxville, TN

“As an Enneagram 7 I’m discovering it irritating proper now having all these concepts for tasks and never having the ability to act on them. For instance, I had an concept for a small enterprise proper earlier than the virus hit however am not in a position to discover it additional for the time being. I’m discovering methods to be artistic and give you tasks based mostly on what I’ve. For instance, cooking, baking, the opposite day I created a stamp utilizing cardboard and straws and used it with my paints to make a cool print that’s now hanging in my lounge!” -Jillian, 28

“As a 7 I LOVE trying ahead to issues. I really like going out to dinner with girlfriends and discovering random dates I can finagle out of my husband. I really like stunning my children with random weekend adventures. None of that’s taking place. It’s all simply the identical. We’re ordering plenty of enjoyable takeout choices and studying the way to make thrilling new dinners. I’ve most likely ordered myself one thing on-line 5+ occasions per week. We additionally received a pet, and I’m ingesting far more wine than I ever have in my life.” -Danielle, 32

Name the Eight a pillar of energy. The Challenger may seem bossy, however that’s only one a part of their complicated, impartial character. Eights are pushed by a want to be in management, so numerous their habits revolves round stopping being managed by others. 

What they miss and the way they’re coping: 

“I earn a living from home and actually take pleasure in being on my own whereas my household is at work and faculty. Now I’m by no means alone. I actually miss being alone. I’m utilizing schedules, order, and routine to manage. We’re making an attempt to maintain mattress occasions the identical, morning routines as regular, dress day-after-day, and keep busy in the course of the week. Weekends nonetheless really feel particular, due to this (no schedules! Nobody has to vary out of pajamas!) and the lengthy week days don’t really feel so unending.” -Mary, 38 

“Probably the most difficult factor about this Covid-19 season is solely not realizing how lengthy it can final. I don’t thoughts the adjustments it necessitates, however not realizing how lengthy it is going to be makes it extraordinarily difficult to know the way to method the each day. Ought to I settle in and make plans to embrace this season? Or will or not it’s over quickly and I ought to simply wait it out. It additionally makes it difficult once you’re main others who’re searching for solutions, once you don’t know what’s coming. I’m doing my greatest to easily be current within the each day, and be at relaxation releasing the will to be in management and on this case, ‘within the know.’” -Katie, 30

“I’m lacking the chance to analysis, chase, and get massive contracts. I’m nonetheless working, however massive tasks are on maintain. I’m spending time doing a ton of interior work and remedy so I’m able to launch and conquer.” -Angel, 42

“The truth that the very best factor to do is nothing is difficult for me as an Enneagram 8. I crave management, so I’m much more scrupulously managing our funds and making an attempt to maintain a routine, significantly figuring out extra to have a spot to place my vitality. I’m additionally making an attempt to take motion in supporting small companies and making donations to really feel like I’m contributing.” -Jessi, 29

“I’m having a tough time discovering methods to place all my vitality to make use of! I’m so used to being energetic day by day at my job, juggling quite a few obligations, speaking to a whole lot of individuals a day some days,  and simply finally using mind area and bodily vitality in so some ways. Not having these shops makes all of it simply sit in my physique until I discover new methods to get it out of me. If I don’t discover methods to cope with this pent up vitality I get very fidgety, anxious, controlling, and finally can’t deal with something. I’m going on walks day by day, and I make certain I’m truly drained on the finish. I’ve been cleansing every part in sight, and have been providing to do little tasks round the home/property for my landlord. For instance, I’m going to tackle gardening and yard work for now and I’m truly enthusiastic about it! I’m additionally beginning to paint once more! My mother and I additionally discovered the way to sew masks, so we’ve been engaged on that for household and associates.” -Danielle, 32

Harmonious and conflict-averse, Nines would somewhat maintain quiet when offended than fire up an argument. They sometimes flow and resist ideas or emotions that may very well be upsetting, each of that are motivated by an interior worry of loss and rejection. 

What they miss and the way they’re coping:

I’m lacking the peace and quiet I used to have in my on a regular basis life. So I’m driving round in my automobile alone very incessantly, working fast errands alone, and going to mattress very early (to be alone).” -Moriah, 34, Minneapolis

“Principally, I’m scuffling with uncertainty in regards to the future and making choices about when to exit and the way to be secure once I do. I’m coping by cocooning with my household, sleeping and testing extra, and doing what I can to guard my very own well being.” -Becca, 39, Minneapolis

“It’s troublesome being dwelling with others on a regular basis—feeling like my area will not be a peaceful and comfortable place anymore. I’m having a day by day quiet time on my own in my room with candles lit and a sound machine turned on.” -Anna, 31, Minneapolis

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